Sunday, December 20, 2009

Doing for Me


Merry Christmas...from a beautiful kitty... image

For the most part, I am an independent person, doing things for myself. Sometimes, like today, I give myself over to someone else's care. I treated myself to a massage. My neighbors, my former landlady and her family, own a massage spa. For many years I've been wanting to do this, but allowed someone to talk me out of it. No more. It was such a wonderful experience and I came out of the spa feeling so relaxed and renewed. I still hurt from my fibro, but knots that I had in some areas of my body are now more relaxed and I have less pain. I've had other massages, but never one like this. I was massaged from head to toe. The masseuse's touch was firm but tender. And I know that when I have the money, I am going back for another massage.

One of my friends makes it a regular habit to get a pedicure. It's something she does for herself. Other friends make time for the gym or yoga. For too many years, I have done social activities, but I can't remember when I did an activity just for me. I used to call them "me" days. They were days when I would plan something for the whole day - a trip to the Zoo, the museum, or something I'd been wanting to do but hadn't done it.

I'm not sure when I stopped seeing myself as worthy of being good to myself, but through the years when I was experiencing extraordinary stress, I rarely did anything like this. It's strange, because during those times I needed things like this the most, but never had the money to do them. Now, it's not to say that I didn't do things. I learned that if I volunteer for places, like the Humane Society, I not only have fun with animals, I get into many activities free.

If God stopped treating me as a loved child, I wouldn't think much of Him, would I? So, even with the lack of money, it's hard to understand why I'd treat His creation - me - that way.

Michelle Rose

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