Friday, December 4, 2009

A Change of Plans


See, no matter if the clouds are dark, the sun (God's light) shines through.

Image from by jonaslife344768082

December 3, 2009, Thursday

Today was supposed to be a nice relaxing day. It was in part. I fiddled around on the computer before going to a play (which I unfortunately left at intermission), then tried a new vegan restaurant, and stopped at the bank for the rent money and money for myself.

I was also supposed to go to a poetry reading that night, but my body had other plans. I was in very bad pain. I've learned to like myself much more than I did, but when I hurt, I would just love to order a new body. Well, Paul begged God to remove "a thorn" from his side and God basically told Paul, no, it's staying there because (imagine this in red ink, since I don't know how to make it that way),"My grace is sufficient for thee; for my strength is made perfect in weakness." II Corinthians 12:9 KJV

Maybe that's what God has in mind for me - using this pain some way. Because I know that I would give anything for God to take it away. I know others have worse pain then I do, although I'm not sure how they deal with it. I've come to terms with my emotional disability, but haven't yet with my physical disability. Is this being grateful to God for my waking up each morning? I am grateful, but is beefing about the pain still being grateful?

Michelle Rose

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